Archives for July 2013

Oh, pregnancy, you so crazy.

So I am now 13 weeks pregnant. My nausea has passed but I still have some looming food aversions, a lot of them. But it’s just don’t want those foods, being near them doesn’t make me sick, so that’s good. I’m sick of being sick.

But, with each new symptom that disappears, a new one always emerges.

Currently, I am a blubbering ball of hormones and insanity. I’m not really screamy or irrationally angry. Well, maybe on occasion. I mostly just cry. All the time. At everything. I’m not sad. I just do it. I tear up in conversations with people and I can’t even pinpoint the trigger, we could be talking about ANYTHING, it doesn’t have to be something really sad, or really happy, or particularly sensitive.


I pretty much can’t watch ANY movie without crying. Any movie. Scary. Romance.Comedy. Action. Doesn’t matter, I’ll cry at a horror flick.The other day Bella was watching YouTube videos and she somehow made her way to a video of the entire Shamu show at SeaWorld and I lost my freaking mind. I was bawling. I mean, I like marine life and stuff but DAMN. I was “OMG THIS IS SO MAGICAL. WHAT AN AMAZING CREATURE. IT’S SO BEAUTIFUL!” Bella looked freaked out and was like “Maybe we should watch puppy videos instead.”

OMG. NO, NOT PUPPIES. So then I cried at puppy videos. Those frisky little fur balls, they get me every time.

Bella likes that “Love You Forever” book, and I do, too. But on a normal day I can’t make it through that thing without crying. Right now, all I have to do is look at the cover of it and I start crying. Hell, I just have to know it’s in the room in close proximity to me and I start getting all misty eyed. Actually, right now, just mentioning that book, I am crying. Dead serious. I totally am. I am completely out of control.

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The mystery is solved!

In December of 2011 I posted this short blurb about how my child had hidden an avocado in our home and we couldn’t find it.

Well, we found it. Yesterday. Yesterday, July 22, 2013.

Mmmm. Delicious.

You are welcome, world.

 

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Craft night disaster: a mommy fail

About a week ago I decided that Bella and I were going to do a craft. I got her a little canvas and planned to let her pick out several colors of crayons. Then we would glue the crayons onto the canvas and melt them with a hair dryer. The wax from crayons drips down the canvas and makes a cool looking design. I was thinking something similar to this:

Yes, that is a photo I pulled off my phone of a Pinterest screen cap. Don’t hate on my graphics.

I waited about a week or so after I bought the canvas before actually attempting the craft with her. I think I knew why. Occasionally I see a little bit of myself in my child (specifically the neurotic and high strung parts of her personality) and this particular craft did not strike me as something I would have enjoyed as a youngster. I liked collecting school supplies but I didn’t like using them, it caused me great distress. I had pencil boxes full of pencils that I refused to sharpen. I would not have liked someone telling me to MELT my crayons. I would have preferred to have kept them sharpened and in the boxes they originally came in. Anyway, I brushed off these lingering feelings of my own childhood anxiety and attempted the craft with her last week.

At first Bella was excited. She stared at the canvas and the crayons in wonder. I told her to pick out what colors she wanted to use and she did so willingly. Then I started hot gluing the crayons onto the canvas. About 3 crayons in, Bella started shaking her head and said, “I don’t LIKE this.” I brushed it off and told her it would be SO FUN once we got to the next phase of our project. She stared at me doubtfully but let me continue.

We let the hot glue dry and then took to the canvas with the blow dryer. It takes a minute or two before the crayons actually start melting, and for that short period of time, Bella watched calmly. Then they started to drip and that is when she LOST.HER.MIND.

She started screaming and crying and heaving. She screamed that I was HURTING the crayons, that I was RUINING them, that I was MAKING A MESS! I turned off the hair dryer and she desperately tried to pry the crayons off the canvas with her little fingers. She couldn’t get them off, so she just kept screaming at me to stop, that she didn’t like it, not to do it anymore. She scooped up the canvas, cradled it in her arms and looked at me like I was a total abusive lunatic that she was absolutely disgusted with. Then she wandered off to the medicine cabinet and doctored the crayons on the canvas with Band-Aids because they were “hurt”.

And that, friends, was the end of craft night.

Some time later, she actually took the Band-Aids off the crayons and let me hang the canvas on the wall of her bedroom. She would not, however, let me use that hair dyer anywhere near them again, though. No ma’am.

A masterpiece, I think.

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My child doesn’t understand safety and I’m dreaming about zombies and baby clothes.

I’ve been quiet for a little bit and that is probably because nothing too exciting has been happening with me. So instead I’ll tell you what Bella has been up to, which will mainly consist of her not listening to me and arguing with me.

First of all, my child just doesn’t understand safety. Lately she has been trying to convince me to leave her in the car when we run errands. My explanation of  “I can’t because you’ll either die of heat stroke or DCS will come and take you away from Mommy,” doesn’t seem to work. She’s like: “I don’t care leave me in the car anyway, I don’t want to go in.” So then I have to drag her screaming and kicking out of the car. Errands are delightful.

She has also taken a particular liking to a certain necklace in my jewelry box. It has a long chain so she can put it on over her neck without having to clasp and unclasp it. Then it hangs down around her navel. I don’t really care for that necklace, it isn’t anything spectacular, so I don’t mind her wearing it because I don’t really care if anything happens to it, but on the other hand, I don’t like her wearing it because it hangs so low and I’m afraid she’s going to get caught on something and choke herself. Once again, she doesn’t understand my reasoning she acts like I’m shooing bamboo under her fingernails when I try to remove it from around her neck. So I let her wear it and just keep an eye on her, making sure she doesn’t get it stuck on something like a door knob. But lately she’s been asking to let her sleep in it and I’m like “NO.” I tried explained to her why that was dangerous, but once again, she dismissed me. She went and laid down in her bed with the necklace on and was like “Look, Mommy, it’s fine, not dangerous!” Then she stood up and stared at me. Then she laid back down, “I’ll show you again, look! Not dangerous.” Uh huh. As convincing as that demonstration is, tiny human, I am still not going to let you sleep with that thing around your neck.

As for me, I’ve just been trying to get through this first trimester. Nausea and vomiting peaked last week, then resided, but it still comes back in little spurts. I’m hungry and thirsty more than usual and incredibly angry and murderous a little moody. I’m also still really tired a lot and sleep like a ROCK at night. I’ve also been having the craziest dreams.

A few weeks ago I dreamed that it was the zombie apocalypse and that we were all running from zombies. Somehow I found myself at the mall where people were looting stores. The store I chose to raid? Gymboree. So then I was running from zombies while carrying these huge Gymboree shopping bags. It’s good to know what my priorities are in the middle of a disaster.

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